The nice marketing folks from the Halekulani got angry with me for this post suggesting (clearly joking) that guests might get a nice upgrade if they claim that they have bedbugs. Not only is that not hotel policy, it was poor taste for me to posit such a preposterous thing. Apologies to the hotel. You run a class operation and I'm sorry if my attempt at humor caused any damage. You can also send guests seeking bedbugs to my house where we can disabuse them of this notion with 5 am wake-up calls from small children and cats.

—Alex, 07/24/08